miqdom

My second day in Las Vegas. I don’t know wat to say about this place.. except about the freaking out.. Not a place i should be. Alone. Shhh. Don’t tell mummy..
I nearly missed my flight in. Why? Because of the layers and layers and layers of unnecessary security. All the same routine..
Unbuckle belt, remove hp, remove watch, remove laptop, remove shoes.. walk through metal detector..
Put laptop back in bag, put on watch, put back hp, wear back shoes, wear back belt..
Benci!!
Like i could smuggle a grenade between my cleavage..
Gosh.. I’m sorry.. Wat language.. Im partially drunk at the moment. On my 2nd bottle of margarita..  I think.. Er wait.. No..
3..
no.. 4?
I can’t remember.. Tee Hee.. Shhhhhh .. Mum’s the word..

Gaahh!!! I can’t take it anymore..!! If i had a choice of hell then this is what hell is like..! It’s like a smaller version of Australia!
Smaller coverage, same population size!
Arrrghh!
Everyone screams, everyone drinks, everyone gives away cards of naked girls..
This place is so intoxicated with alcohol and cigars that it makes me want to just run back in to my crummy-psycho-era-motel and just stay there..
shudder..

It’s a loud, flashy place.. Like me. Har har har.. Minus flashy. I dun flash anything. I really did hope that mark was here. I wouldn’t mind having a guy on my arm. At least it keeps the creeps away.. A guy approached me. I was so stunned..

Unknown Dude: Yo ma. Wat say u and me go get a drink?

Me (about to crap in my pants): Eh.. No. Thank you.

Unknown Dude: Why not? On me.

Me (crapped in my pants): Sorry. I’m taken.

Unknown Dude: What!? I’ll make your night so memorable you’ll forget all about him.

Me (My life flashing before my eyes): No. I don’t think so. She’ll kick your ass.

Unknown Dude (looking a bit bewildered..): Well, you have a good evening mam’

I dunno if he ran. But i ran! Ahahahaha..! I ran sooooo far away.

Urgh.. I would love to tell you bout grand canyon.. But..

The Gods of Slumber calls my name now..

I must go..

Hey Ah Ya Ya! Hey Ah Ya Ya! Hey Ah Ya Ya!

Day 1 to Day 14 in Houston.. was nothing but information overload.. and fear.. Heart gripping, cold sweat dripping fear! I wish I could say it was because of my tests .. not to mention the overwhelming pressure i felt from my peers.. sadly that died out after like day 3.. Ha ha ha.. Probably caused by the mellowing effect of Patapon on my PSP.. (YEESSHH!! I’VE WAITED SOO LOONGG!!) .. Nope.. it was the attack of the mad elephant.. crazy wild mad elephant we so affectionately named.. Mini-Me aka POL aka MD aka BFH aka B*T*C*. Some scary stunts she pulled. So freaking sick of her. Ruins practically everyone’s career.. Good riddance.. May you go far far away.. Or.. in the words of milord..

May the fleas of a thousand camels .. <- 18PG ->

Ahh.. Ignore Ignore.. PSP & me..! I found my temporary Happy Place.. accompanied by sore thumbs and wrists..! Tee hee.. It’s all worth it.. Happy Place.. Happy Place.. (Gesticulate Gesticulate)

So wat did I do since I came here? Nothing.. That was the other problem I had to faced.. Gah wat a waste of my time..

Good side to travelling alone : You do watever, whenever, wherever the feck You want!! No waiting, No assumptions, No waste of time, No disappointments and probably have no one to blame if things worked out!

Down side to travelling alone : No one to take pictures for you.. God you have no idea how many ppl have approached me and asked if i needed help!? They thought i was this crazy girl trying to take a picture of herself..

But hey.. I did go somewhere..! Just too damn expensive doing it alone.. (!^&%!$!$!^$&!##!) But now I can scratch one off my things-to-do-before-i-die list ..

NASA Johnson Space Center..!

Gahha.. That was fun! Quite impressive for first timers (I can tell you i’ll wont go again unless someone pays for it..) So wat do they have? We can call them Retro-gadgets. Something you can liken to an extinct mammoth.. hahahaha.. I mean really.. Dial phones on the controls? 200kB max of ram? God! Can you imagine wat it must have been like when you had to call an extensioN!?

SPACE SHUTTLE: HOUSTON! WE HAVE A PROBLEM!!

OPERATOR: I’LL CALL THE CONTROL ROOM NOW!

(chik-trrrrk-tak-tak-tak-chik-trrrrrk-tak-tak-tak-chik-trrrrk-tak-tak-tak)

Then phone rings again (yeah the same phone)

SPACE SHUTTLE: HOUSTON.. DO YOU COPY?

OPERATOR: #$%@&*!! (Cos he has to redial the number..)

Hahahahahaha!

Sigh.. Hilarious.. I was grinning stupidly when i thought of that.. hahaha.. So wat else?

ROCKETS, SPACE SHUTTLES, PPL WHO BLEW UP IN SPACE, AN EYE & TWO FEET PPL.. etc etc…

That was fun..

It was worth it.. At least I dun have any regrets leaving Houston..

Next stop? Las Vegas!

Nothing can be more miserable than
working on a weekend.
Yesh and that ladies and gentlemen
are 2 consecutive days (Saturday & Sunday)
I feel like I’m on a brainstorming
marathon till end April.. Oh God..

The nightmare.. Eat, Live and Breath
Seismic..

The tale of 3 immortals and Mass.

Once upon a time, there lived 3
mortals whom became immortals in a seismic world. All who lived and breathed by
data processing worshiped them. Then came a day when the 3 achieved
enlightenment and became immortals of Omega. Each equipped with their own means of ingenious, they continue to
roam the world and brought evolution to all processors.

One day, immortal A said “Gentlemen,
it was an honor to serve with you.”
The other two nodded their heads vigorously.
Immortal B then said “I feel
accomplished and blessed.”
The other two nodded their heads
again.
Immortal C was silent. Then he spoke
“So what goes on from here..?”

The 3 fell silent.. Immortal C was
right. They were not at the end of their journey.
In fact, there was no end and
beginning to their journey.
All at once the 3 realized that they
were in a very dire situation.
There was a sudden surge of
helplessness and lost of direction.
They realized they were going to
face it sooner or later.
But neither were willing or had the
gall to face the fact..
Their immortality was supposed to be
a journey of wonders and discoveries.
Now it seemed like a dreaded trip..
They could no longer deny the
undeniable.
They were supposed to be the-all-knowing..
But this particular notion seemed to
have missed their radar somewhat..

Eternity stretched before them towards
infinity..

An infinity of…

BOREDOM..

Far far away, amidst the hills of WesternGeco,
a small village of Processors heard a cry of 3…

 “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…!!! ”

“WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!? WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!?” Shrieked Immortal
A.
“Hold yourself together man!! We’ll
think of something! We’re the all knowing!” Retorted Immortal C.
“Oh yeah?! If we’re all knowing, how
come we never thought of this!?” Croaked Immortal B.
“It’s all your fault..!! You and
your need of company! Now I’m stuck in this crappy state for eternity! Forever
thinking and thinking and thinking…!”
Immortal A then grabbed Immortal C’s
neck and started to wring him.
(Immortal A would never have immortalized if not for immortal C’s insistent nagging <and stalking> on needing a friend to think with him.. )

“Stop it! Stop it! There’s got to be
a way.. There’s got to be solution..! We must meditate on this!”
All turned and looked at Immortal B
(who for some reason seemed to be the calmer one.. – we suspect maybe because
he was the last to attain immortality and it didn’t really occur to him yet that
there’s an endless ride ahead of him..)

For 7 days and 7 nights.. the 3
immortals sat in front of their workstations and zoned out..

On the 7^th night, they
were rudely awoken by a gurgle of laughter.

3 confused immortals looked at each
other and tried to find the source of this continuous burst of joy.
The trail of guffaws led them to a
mass.. who seemed more than happy..
The mass was happily processing and
enjoying it with other masses.

The 3 were confused (data processing is not supposed to be enjoyable) but continued to speculate.

Suddenly the mass found a problem in the
processing and started to choke and gesticulate. Soon there was a trail of
profanities and curses which was soon replaced with odd sounds.

The immortals realized that was the
way she worked. She cursed when she hit brick walls, crack sarcastic jokes, spat threats at the workstation and then laughed when she overcame
them and all the while putting on a ‘box-smile’.
It also didn’t seem to bother her
when it was one of her fellow mass that contributed to her suffering (assuming that she was suffering from stress).

The 3 were enjoying all of this more than they hoped. 

“Fun..is the solution!!” The 3 concluded!

And so.. the 3 immortals then
immediately concocted a plan and decided that they will drag her along on their
journey to see how far a mass can go with immortals.

The thought of torture never crossed
mass’ mind and so she consented to it..

And so begins the journey of the 3
immortals and a mass..

Little did the mass knew that.. What doesn’t kill you.. only makes you wish
it did…

Malaysia has outdone it self again..
Ethics? Flush them down the toilet bowl wont u? We are the only nation that can swear in more than one language!
Economy? We dont need help. Why? Look! It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No! It’s 2 angkasawan in the air spinning a gasing!
Military? Hell! We’ve got the best offense and defense in the world! And you dont need training! All you need is ‘tuak’ and a words of profanities to motivate them.. Screaming! Picking up their pitch forks and parangs.. Slashing anyone and everyone in their way.. ok.. so the navigation might be off a bit..and you pray they’re moving in the opposite direction.. but that’s the whole point isnt it? Who goes to war thinking bout how the enemy feels? Everyone wants a piece of someone on the battle field..and the only words going through their brains are "KILL KILL KILL.. " with the occasional "OMG OMG OMG"
PS: U can get ur best supply of man power from Brickfields.
But you gotta admit it.. They have guts.Respect.
oooooOOOooo! I bet you’re wondering if we had the best land military, what about the air force eh?
No worries!
Our motto for this decade "MENGANKASAKAN BANGSA!"
Spacify the nation! And yes yes! You got it right! We have 2 men in the air.. spinning their mighty gasings!
Throw at us anything u want! Hell! Bring the F22s and JumpJets!
Vertical lift offs and semi-space cruising jets.. PAH!
We only need 2 men and their mighty gasings!
So why worry bout economics? We’re not spending money! Hahaha..
Little clips on men with their Gasings are little notes compliments of jon the fat prince. hahaha

Malaysia.. Malaysia.. Bangsa Terangkasa..
Malaysia.. Malaysia.. Roti Canai juga..

Gah Gha Gha..

KLCC’s decor team has gone nuts again. They hung up gigantic wreaths with white tinsels attached to it. I guessed they were trying to emphasize a white christmas. But alas.. Once again.. Wrong weather, wrong country, wrong culture.
That thing looked like something someone would send to a funeral. A very big funeral..! Judging by the size of it! hahahha. No offense.
And oh! One shudders to think how the christmas tree would fare!
Penny for my thoughts? Id wonder : "Would it be large? Tall?! Heavily laden with ornaments and garlands?"
Bite me ass on that..!
The tree looked like a fecking overturned cupcake!
Kau Sai! I’ll upload the pictures soon, and let the horror grip your heart itself.

Drum banging on one beat at the back ground..
Pap Pap Pap Pap Pap Pap Pap Pap

Lump sat alone in a boggy marsh, (High hat go dshh!!)
totally emotionless except for her heart
Mud flowed up into lump’s pajamas
she totally confused all the passing pihranas..

WOoo!!

It’s been ages since i heard this song!
It just brings back loads of good old memories..
Sigh.. the adolescent me.. rockin on!

Lump lingered last in line for brains
and the one she got was sorta rotten and insane
Small things so sad that birds could land
Is lump fast asleep or rockin’ out with the band?

WOoo!!

She’s lump, she’s lump
She’s in my head
She’s lump, she’s lump, she’s lump
She might be dead

All hail the Presidents of the USA!

Man.. i wonder where they are now.. SOngs like these just sparks up old ones like Silverchair’s Freak, Toad the Wet Sprocket’s Come down and Supergrass’ Alright…

Which reminds me i think i’ll go download that show.. Clueless..
Gosh.. that was like our 90minute Hannah Montana and Lizzie Mcguire..

Or was it?

Nah Hannah and Lizzie are too young.. Wrong age scope..
Hmm.. So what is the best way to describe the movie Clueless?
A movie that’s released at the prime of the 90s. A 1995 chick flick with a commendable soundtrack. The only one i could actually put up with. Gha Gha Gha..!

Chun-ness!

Lump was limp and lonely and needed a shove
(This is the part where the base gets cranked up to a higher note.. majestic!)
Lump slipped on a kiss and tumbled into love
She spent her twenties between the sheets
Life limped along at sub-sonic speeds

I’m so in love with Joe Mad. Gosh.. He’s definitely the drive to making me draw better…
And im so influenced by his work.
The big puffy hands.. The big shoes..
Jagged lines..
Pure JoeMadness..

It’s the best yin and yang of gentle strokes that depicts hard looks.. viceversa..

But anyways.. let’s end this blog wit a stupid joke i heard 2 days ago.

A friend was complaining how suei he was that he couldnt hook himself up wit any girl.
He thinks life is unfair to him cos he thinks that all the ugly dudes out there can get a girl but he cant.. (uh-huh.. i’ll never date a guy who thinks like that.. i dont think life is unfair.. i think life is just logical..! hahaha)
Anyways.. an indian colleague was said.. "dude.. u ’suei’ man.. u gotta mandi bunga.. "
And so my friend asked what kind of flowers..
And the indian dude said.. "7 kinds.. can be any kind…." (apparently it’s supposed to cleanse ur ’suei-ness’ away.. hahahaha..)
And he continued.. ".. except.."
And i couldnt help but asked.. "except wat??"
And he said.. "except bunga raya.. nanti jadi terlalu patriotik.."

hahahahahahahahahahhahahaha

idiots..

The little joys in my work. The only joy in my work.

Junk
food..
Weed..
Booze..
Junk
food..
Salt..
Fast
food..
Crap..

All 25
years of it..
and i’m
still alive!

yesh!
that’s a good reason to celebrate.. i wonder if i’ll be able to hit the next
decade if i have a bit tad more of :

Junk
food..
Weed..
Booze..
Junk
food..
Cuban
Cigars..
Salt..
Fast
food..
Junk
food..
Cuban cigars..
Cuban
cigars..
Cuban
cigars..
Salt..

Yeah..

that
should sound really REALLY GOOD..!

mUAHAHAHAHA..!

I like..
I like..

So wat
DID i do on the night of the 20th before i fell asleep..? Oh yeah.. I tried the nostalgic,
let the past 25 years of ur life flash before ur eyes moment..

i
remembered as far back as 1985.. when i was related by blood and of no choice
to a FAT PRINCE.. and that does not make me feel like ROYALTY at all..
something like being dethroned..

hahahaha..

and then
something bout 1989.. when i had friends who’d steal my colour pencils and
erasers..

and then
1992.. something bout 7 ppl surrounding me asking me who is my best friend..
shudder..
it’s like
the scariest thing ever.. and mind u.. i wasn’t THAT tall then..

and
1995.. when i was seperated from a close friend.. and she ran off to another
school cos we werent in the same class anymore.. Geez.. the things we do then..

1996..
the land of sheila and joanna lee.. hahaa.. enter milord.. in choir class..
why is it
that singing bali hai from the musical south pacific then was hilarious? and
why is it singing yellow bird never tends to build up a giggle then?

1997..
the year of PMR and a freaking nightmare at that.. i think i got the most
bullying then..

1998
started to look more like a blast.. cos im seeing milord and friends and we
always have stupid things to say.. also from the producers of bali hai and
yellow bird.. God..

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
snort snort.. oh oh.. where was i?

1999 when
we all start to cramp the impossibly short time we have for tuitions cos it’s
going to be fecking-SPM-in-Nov-and-i-cant-fecking-fail-that!

2000..
nightmare.. mental reject.. (static loads and loads of static.. with the
occasional STAY TUNED - SIARAN TERGENDALA - RGB colors at the background and an
irritating sound that goes beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepppppp)

2001..
nightmare.. mental reject.. (think of a truncated video tape being re-recorded
with some other movie/series/ - loads of flashing with numerous scenes from God-knows-where-when-and-why..)
Those
were the two most terrifying, disappointing, disturbing months for me..

Thank God
fongyi was there..
Thank God
for fongyi..
Thank
God..
Thank
God..

And i’ll
be damned if i had to flash back through those 2 years, 10 minutes before it
strikes 12 midnight.. no.. not worth it..
Fongyi
and i have enough wealth of memories together to remenisce for another life
time.. So 2 years ain’t going to kill me..

2002..
USM.. THANK GOD.. OH THANK GOD..!! HE LOVES ME.. GOD LOVES ME.. hahahaha. It
was the year of baywatch and scuba diving! I wonder wat made me want to be a
lifeguard.. hmmmmmm…..

2003.. i
think i was in Australia then.. i think.. It’s a bit hazy. Amazing.. but if not for that.. there would never have been another
re-entry of sheila the ooi and ms. phuah. More crazy escapades with Alice in
Taiwan, Ethan and Ray from Singaporeans (probably the only ones i could ever
stand for the life i know till now).. and Lujun the beijing boy and many more..
crazy.. the craziest 6 months of my life..

2004..
enter the fat girl who left uni half a year ago.. God.. i was sooo fat i made
the fat mama jokes all look like they went to marie france.. Gah.. Fat.. loads
of Fat..
and broke
too.. heh heh.. broke and fat.. and working my ass off in starbucks.. while
wasting my life away in a useless 2nd semester in uni..

2005..
sigh.. thank God for fong mei, the internship and melissa teoh. Thank u God..

2006..
thank u lord for all good-hard-working-cooperative ppl in my practical grp.
Thank u Lord for all that in some off-site training in pekan kuantan, the town
of i-think-u’ll-get-kidnapped-and-raped-if-u-walk-out-even-in-broad-daylight-with-all-ur-galfriends. Thank you thank you. and thank u for all the baking..
it was hot.. it was hot and crazy under the sun.. all that for my final year
project.. leh mak.. thank u for melissa teoh again. Her supply of emotional
rollercoasters and enough mental sufferin’ via her brother. Thank u for the job
i got at the end of the year.. and hello world..!

2007..
mark .. mark.. question mark.. .. question mark..

My bday
wish.. : i will not do this again next year.. cos fecking hell that was tiring..

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

What
constitutes as a public apology?

The
word ‘sorry’ that is posted on a public domain..

Ha
Ha Ha

Sigh.
Even the Ha Ha Ha lacks its usual ring. It’s been a few months of emotional rollercoaster-ing
for me. And I must admit, I do feel like running away right now. Starting
over.. somewhere else. Not looking back.. The great escape.. Not wanting
anything more than what lies ahead or what I make of the future.

But
that’s a coward’s way out. And I never take the coward’s way out. I like the
bang, the boom, the confrontation. I’ll never bow down without a fight..

Not
until yesterday..

It
wasn’t the persistence of the problem or the never-ending, never-possible,
never-right solutions that has finally beaten me down.. No. Usually it’s that
that gets me all the more worked up and I’m fired up to take on it. No..  

Exhaustion.

It
was exhaustion and heartache..

That
has broken me in some ways. I could already feel my resistance wearing thin half
a year back. But it finally broke. It finally broke yesterday.

Michelle
all-mighty has lost faith in good will, hope, love and care.

Because
she bloody hell doesn’t know how to do it/what to do anymore.

If
what I’ve been doing had been wrong, the heartache and disappointment is
definitely not encouraging me to try it any other way.

Because
I no longer know the balance of giving and taking.

I
finally given up myself to grieving.

Grieving
for my lost.

Grieving
for my inability.

Grieving
for my lack of control.

I
grieve because I’m too exhausted to make myself happy or right.

I
grieve because I don’t know how to make myself happy without hurting or not meeting
another’s expectations.

And
all this grieving is taking a toll on me. Cos my back keeps aching for some
weird apparent reason..!!!

I
just didn’t know how to be there at the right time at the right place. And God
knows if I’ll ever know if what I said was right. God knows if I’ve ever been
as important to you as I thought I was to you.

But
it’s over. I can’t take the heartache anymore. I can’t keep on caring and
knowing what I do will never comfort you. I rather not care and give u a reason
to hate me than to care and give you THAT reason to dislike my methods of
caring. And though I know in some ways we share the blame, it doesn’t matter
anymore if you’ll ever talk to me and say your peace.. Because I know you’re
too proud to admit to anything and I’m not asking for one. I’m too exhausted
and too hurt to try.

So I’m
sorry.

I’m
sorry you had to give him up because (assuming I’m right) of something stupid I
said.

I’m
sorry I wasn’t there for you when I should.

I’m
sorry I made you cry.

I’m
sorry I couldn’t try harder.

I’m
sorry I’m not strong enough for the both of us.

I’m
sorry I can’t give us this one last closure.

I’m
sorry I can’t make this apology anymore public.

I’m
sorry.

it’s just one of those days when u were stretching ur arms (thanks to ur not so friendly neighborhood ergonomic chair) .. and u look out the window and u have this caricature of yourself screaming… 
the skies are all darken grey again…
conveniently at 515pm..
crap crap.. please release me.. please let me go home..
no no..
those are no longer the words i swear under my breath anymore..
my beloved pl has run off at 430pm.. and out of habit i guess..
Hey.. fine by me. As long as he doesnt dump me with more work.
But oh.. never-lasting hopes like that are like the dreams of cabana boys that goes poof when the ring of ur stupid alarm clock jars into your head..
He goes home. That he does. But never before leaving me enough work to get me all busy till after punching out of work time. Sleasy piece of -toot-.
But hey.. a working michelle is a happy michelle..
At least until (and i hope never - unless it involves me) the next phase project member reshuffling..
My team mate is abandoning ship.
Nooooo!
and in her place.. comes SHE-RA. (royal - whore to some ppl but aiya.. so long.. hard to type..)
hahahaha
Hmmm.. that word seemed to get me to think bout 2 things..
Doesn’t Ra stand for God? and she as in she?
so does that make our vintage cartoon character a GODdess??
Stupid revelations like this never fails to happen to me after days of sleepless nights.
ANyways.. back to SHE-RA.
oh my pl loves her.
Infatuated by her.. (or by i would suspect her pair of -b–bies-)
He’s gone over the hill and talks to her in softiest - woftiest voice..
Shudder.. The last time he spoke like that to me was followed up by sarcasm and an hour plus of grueling -u-shud-know-this-shit-already- lecture.
Oh dear Lord..
And so my team mate is abandoning ship. Apparently she’d rather die drowning, bitten off by sharks, die from puffer fish poisoning than to have to put up with him.
Smart and not smart. But i really hope she doesnt go.
She’s my only companion in this crazy CRAZY world..
well at least in my pl’s world..
But if she does finally succumb to that temptation.. to end her misery, i would be left with SHE-RA and my pl.
That will be like living in this era of the LOOOVVEEE BOOATTT..
I’ll hear giggles..
Soft whispers..
and feel like that tired, ridiculously low-waged, over retired aunty for a secretary that will take their notes, coffee, calls, and probably do more ‘miscellaneous’ stuff so that they have time to do the MORE ‘important’ stuff..
shudder.. and censored..
the looovee booattt..
oh Lord mighty above..
my beloved team mate..
anyone..
Dun abandon ship..

it’s
a great day today..

Not
hazy.. just cloudy.. with a hue of orange. Sounds fantastic compared to my last
few days of the sun looking like an egg yoke or a pink ping pong ball.. Thanks
to haze, the scattering effect of pollutant, and it’s molecules coinciding
with light waves, the sky tends to let off a weird combo of colors lately. But
I’m just grateful right now that I see the usual blue, orange or pastel white.
I’m happy. (Partially contributed by the absence of my project leader.)

Every
sigh, every sharp intake of breath, every wince, every long exhale of breath..

Everything
about him is getting to me…! Every movement he makes. Any sound he makes, makes
my spine cold. If the shit hits the fan with him.. I die.

He
dies, I die.

He
gets the shit, he comes back and gives me shit.

I
am scared..!

The
first few signs of depression..

Hahahaha…

Apart
from that..
EVERYONE’S
GETTING MARRIED!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Gasp
gasp gasp.. im soooo not there man.. Im soo not there.. I’m soooo not ready..!
I’m so glad my grandma doesn’t read blogs..!
Hahahahahaha..

Anyhoo..
denial..

We all
survive because we’re always in denial..

We
deny the fact that we’re stressed.

We
deny the fact that we’re over worked.

We
deny the fact that we’re tired.

We
deny the fact that we’re afraid.

We
deny the fact that we heard anything.

We
deny the fact that we did anything.

We
deny the fact that we’re in denial..

I survive cos i deny the fact that im in denial..

It’s
such a beautiful day today.. The sky is blue. IT’s HAZELESS!!! Now how often
can you rate KL as being hazeless? Almost a never on the scale. It’s a great
day to just go out there and play.
On
the contrary, any day despite the fact whether if it’s hazy or rainy, is still
a great day to go out to play as long as I dun have to face the shit I face everyday.

Am
I a workaholic with God complexes..? I dunno. Maybe I am. How did the fat
prince put it…

ME
:  I’m miserable.
FATPRINCE
: So?
ME
:  I hate my life. I hate my job. I have no
sense of achievement.
FATPRINCE
: And you’re considering leaving but you know u won’t get paid as much to go through all this shit again.
ME
:  Yes.. What do I do..? I don’t know
wat else to do. Even an all ppl person like me can only take a certain amount of
shit.
FATPRINCE
: You know.. It’s going to be the same somewhere else..
ME
:  No it’s not. Not everyone goes through
my shit. My friends are Loved, man..
LOOOVVEEED !!!!
FATPRINCE
: How is this my problem in the first place..? Why do I have to listen to your crap??
ME
:  Cos im paying for dinner..
FATPRINCE
: %#@!$
ME
:  I have no freedom of speech. My
hands are bound. Ifeel like I’m drowning
in my endless quest of trying to impress the impossibly  impressed..
FATPRINCE
: But does it stop you?
ME
:  What?
FATPRINCE
: Does it stop you from getting things done?
ME
:  …
FATPRINCE
: You know wat?? THAT’S your problem. You’re a workaholic with God complexes. You try to pitch in something and when no one cares about the shit you try to tell, when they refuse to do
anything.. do you know wat happens??
ME
:  What?
FATPRINCE
: You happened..! Or shall we say ‘GOD’ happened. You say ‘FUCK IT’. You DO it your way, get
the Shit fixed anyway and all is Well. You don’t like PLAN A?
You say ‘fuck it’ again. And then You do things yourself and
go with your plan which is not plan B. It’s plan ‘michelle-almighty’.
Right?
ME
:  …
FATPRINCE
: RIGHT???
ME
:  …
FATPRINCE
: OI FUCKER!!! RIGHT!??!? ANSWER ME!!!
ME
:  Shut up and EAT your mac and cheese u dumb
fuck.
FATPRINCE
: …

Price
of dinner : RM148.90
Lesson
learnt : 0

Michelle
Almighty feels broke.